Monday, August 23, 2010

Inventory of My Health

Given that I’ve been working in healthcare for 3 weeks, I think that it’s time to update you all on my health in Rwanda…and maybe explain the lax updating of recent. So, here we go:

Malaria: Not a problem in the mountains. Nobody else even takes their malaria pills. (I still take mine, along with 3 kinds of vitamins…which doesn’t compete with how many Cory Hoeferlin and Sarah Koo take in order to rough the harsh environment of Hanover, NH…but I think it’s impressive.) We have so much malarone left over at the house that I feel guilty and think we should just start donating it to the people in Kigali that do have malaria.

1 ½ Dislocated Shoulders: I say 1 and a half because I think each of them was a ¾ dislocation. The first was when whitewater rafting, but my shoulder only rolled out and then rolled back in. I didn’t really want to tell my mommy this, but it rolled back in improperly. I could tell because I couldn’t really use my arm for a week. The 2nd dislocation was on purpose because I knew that there was something wrong with my shoulder. So when I was drunk/stupid enough, I dislocated and re-located it by myself. Then I played Flight Control on somebody’s iPod for about an hour to ignore the pain. Eli Mitchell wins more hardcore points. (Fun fact: Of the 4 muzungu staff members, 1 has had shoulder surgery, and 2 of us have frequently dislocating shoulders.)

2nd Worst Hangover Ever: The 1st worst hangover ever resulted in me being admitted to the hospital twice and having to drive 5 hours back from Eldred’s paradise in Canada with a 105 fever. This hangover has resulted in puking and having diarrhea for…at least 2 days straight…it hasn’t quite stopped yet. The doctor on our staff (who doesn’t drink) just laughed at me all day Sunday when I thought it was a hangover. She had a little more sympathy when I was ordered to bed rest on Monday when we realized that I might actually be sick. Silly me for thinking a small bottle of Pepto would suffice for a year. It doesn’t even last a day!

Fleas: I kid you not…and it’s not helping animals win any more sympathy in my heart. If I ever have a child that wants a dog – well – I’m just not going to ever have a child that wants a dog. When I asked the doctor on our staff about my weird rash that seemed to be spreading, she said “fleas” so calmly that I assumed she was joking. It turns out that she was not. And I will apparently be scarred with evidence of having fleas for the rest of my life. Thank god I didn’t get any on my face. She’s going to get me antiseptic body wash, which just sounds painful. She also says the only way to get rid of the fleas is to get rid of the source: our dog Emi (only 2nd worst spelling I’ve seen for a dog’s name in my life…take a guess as to what the first one is, Mom). Since actually getting rid of Emi is not an option, you’d best believe she is below Ele (pronounced Ellie – okay so I gave away the first worst dog spelling) on the “dogs I avoid as much as possible” scale.

East African Black Lung Disease: Apparently the persistent cough is part of one’s rite of passage to living in East Africa. At least, hopefully, starting tomorrow…I will officially be “living” in East Africa. We’re off to Kigali again in an attempt to get passport pages and a visa! (That is, if my stomach is in the mood to make a 2 hour car ride.)

1 comment:

Debbie said...

Honey are they fleas or possibly bed bugs....if the later...try putting your mattress in the sun and boilng all your clothes. Love you. MOM